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Xiang Yu was in the middle of the banquet yet didn’t say a word, he just drank in silence.
The King of Chu either insinuated things1指桑骂槐: lit. to point at the mulberry tree and curse the locust tree; meaning to scold indirectly, or to make oblique accusations or gave him orders without a care. He didn’t even bother to lift his eyelids, he just silently signalled the servers to continue pouring wine.
His previous dislike towards Liu Bang and his petty tricks was completely overwhelmed by his hatred for the King of Chu who incessantly jumped on the border between life and death.
However, it was unacceptable for any minister to kill his lord no matter how unreasonable they were.
Xiang Yu had discussed with his staff all through the previous night, and decided on a plan to implicate, migrate, then assassinate.
After this banquet was over, he would control all the cities in Guanzhong, so there was no need for the King of Chu to point fingers everywhere. First promote him to Emperor Yi of Chu, then name himself as Hegemon-King and he would act in place of the emperor.
With the Chu army’s current deterrence power and the fact that this course of action would not shake the interests of the other warlords, he did not expect much obstruction to carrying out these three tasks in sequence.
Xiang Yu, who was busy drinking wine and making plans for after the banquet, didn’t notice Xiang Zhuang performing a sword dance aimed at Liu Bang on Fan Zeng’s instructions; didn’t notice his most trusted uncle Xiang Bo joining the performance and blocking all the strikes; didn’t notice the King of Chu erupting in anger, forcibly stopping the farce, and kicking Xiang Zhuang out; and he missed the eye contact between Liu Bang and Zhang Liang, as well as the suspiciously long time Liu Bang was absent due to ‘answering the call of nature’…
Music and dance intertwined, wine flowed ever on. The palace had many rooms, so the commotion caused by Lü Bu outside wasn’t transmitted in the slightest.
Zhang Liang, who had been entrusted with the heavy task of stalling for time until Liu Bang reached the Han camp, calmly held a cup of wine as he exchanged toasts, not showing a single clue as to what he and his lord were planning.
He knew that it only took a stick of incense’s worth of time2A timekeeping method before clocks, approximately 30 minutes to reach a small group of palaces garrisoned by Han soldiers.
But he also knew that anything could happen on the way. The longer he dragged on, the better it was for Liu Bang, so he tried his best to stabilise things here.
At this moment, the doors to the hall which had been shut tight since the banquet began were suddenly pushed open. A man rushed in, shouting, “Report, something happened!”
This uninvited guest brought an abrupt end to the music and dance.
The King of Chu shot to his feet. “What happened? Why are you so panicked!” he exclaimed.
All eyes fell on Lü Bu, who had suddenly entered the palace hall.
Of those present, there were few who could recognise him, but apart from Han Xin, none were not highly valued in the Chu army.
There weren’t many seated on the raised platform. Among them, the King of Chu had the most honourable seat facing east; Xiang Yu sat facing south, which was the second most honourable seat; Fan Zeng and Liu Bang also had first-class seats, facing north; Zhang Liang faced west, with the least honourable seat of the five.
Their followers and attendants, such as Han Xin, were not qualified to participate and could only stand behind them.
Han Xin looked at Lü Bu’s filthy body and subconsciously pinched the meat he had secretly hidden in his sleeve for his brother who missed the banquet as he suppressed the bewilderment in his eyes.
Xiang Yu was already half drunk, his sight wasn’t clear, but he became slightly more alert when the music suddenly stopped. He cast his gaze to the intruder, but only a double image appeared before his eyes.
Frowning, he secretly massaged his swollen temples and asked quietly, “Who is it?”
Han Xin heard him clearly. Stepping closer, he replied, “General, it is Attendant Lü.”
“Fengxian?” Xiang Yu looked around blankly, and only then did he realise that Lü Bu had never come in. “When did Fengxian go out?”
Xiang Bo coughed lightly, glared at Lü Bu who was the centre of a fuss again, and said in a low voice, “Your horse didn’t have anyone looking after it, so I ordered Attendant Lü to go.”
Although Xiang Yu was only half awake, he still frowned and expressed his disapproval. “How can you force a warrior to do the work of a groom?”
While they had been whispering, Lü Bu hadn’t answered the King of Chu. He only looked at Xiang Yu hesitantly.
This slight delay immediately infuriated the King of Chu, who already hated Xiang Yu — great, even a soldier of Chu dared to listen to a mere general before him, the king!
A courtier immediately stepped out and arrogantly demanded, “His Majesty asked you a question, why aren’t you answering?”
Zhang Liang silently put down his cup and watched with fixed eyebrows.
This unusually tall Chu soldier looked like a mess and had his clothes on backwards for some reason, but his appearance was extraordinary and his face, which some might describe as fair, was… surprisingly clean.
Suspicion suddenly arose in his heart.
But before he could think more, Lü Bu raised his head. “It is a secretive matter of much importance, there are many people here…” he said reluctantly.
Seeing that he was unarmed, the King of Chu let down his guard and said impatiently, “Then I allow you to come closer!”
Lü Bu glanced uncertainly at Xiang Yu again. By the time he slowly shuffled towards him, the King of Chu was so angry that he was about to urge him again.
He straightened and pushed his chest out. On his third step, when he was nearly twenty metres3十丈: 1 zhang = 10 chi; 1 chi ≈ 0.22m away from the king, Xiang Yu finally moved a little as he adjusted his posture.
He only shifted because he was sore from sitting too long, but Lü Bu, who had caught a glimpse of his small movement from the corner of his eye, suddenly burst into action!
Under everyone’s watchful eyes, this Chu soldier who interrupted the banquet swiftly snatched a guqin from a nearby musician and smashed it against the ground!
Lü Bu hadn’t brought any weapons inside in order to lower these people’s vigilance, so he simply made one from local materials now.
After the rather heavy guqin reached his hands, it became as light as a feather. Then before anyone could react, he dragged the broken guqin straight at Xiong Xin, the King of Chu!
He had no intention of playing tricks. Even the already suspicious Zhang Liang was powerless to stop him from the moment the King of Chu ordered him to go closer.
There was only one person in the entire hall who could stop him, and that was Xiang Yu.
However, Xiang Yu was still focused on his plans for the King of Chu after the banquet, and he was more than a little tipsy. How could he have thought that Lü Bu would suddenly attack the King of Chu directly!
Meanwhile, Lü Bu had a clear goal and he had fully learned the lesson from Liu Bang’s escape just now — never talk nonsense before doing the deed, kill first then monologue. He went up with big strides and, before the servants around the King of Chu could do more than widen their eyes, lifted the broken guqin and smashed its jagged edge at the King of Chu’s head!
The guqin, made of nanmu wood,4Nanmu wood is from the Phoebe zhennan tree, which is found only in the Guizhou, Hubei, and Sichuan provinces; in the past, nanmu wood was so rare that only royal families could afford its use. Wikipedia was an instrument which could play exquisite music in the hands of a skilled musician; in the hands of Lü Bu, his strength turned it into a downright lethal weapon.
He used 80% of his strength to greet the King of Chu’s shocked face. Even if his skull wasn’t turned into a smear on the ground, it was enough to cover it in blood.
In the blink of an eye, the King of Chu’s skull was caved in and he died miserably.
Everyone present sucked in a breath of cold air.
Such a brutal method, such strength!
“You!!!”
The official closest to the King of Chu was scared out of his wits. He scrambled backwards as he screamed, “What are you doing, quickly take down the assassin!”
The king’s guards who were a little farther away recovered faster, they angrily drew the swords at their waists and rushed towards Lü Bu!
However, the current Lü Bu was no longer as pathetic as a few minutes ago, he had no need to borrow a guqin to kill.
He ignored the official pissing himself in terror as he leaned down to take the man’s sword.
Although he could handle all manner of weapons, swords and bows were among his most familiar.
Having finally obtained his best weapon in hand, Lü Bu completely regained the ease he felt as he rushed to and fro impetuously on the battlefield.
“Perfect, now I don’t have to catch you one by one myself!” he laughed.
He drew the sword out of its sheath and faced the King of Chu’s guards who surrounded him without an ounce of fear.
While Lü Bu fought one against a hundred and caused blood to run like a river, the Chu soldiers present were first shocked then stupefied.
The man was a blatant kingslayer, but he was one of their own, and even wore the uniform belonging to the general’s sentries…
They were Chu soldiers. According to common sense, they should definitely kill the person who murdered the King of Chu, without question.
However, the King of Chu had always treated General Xiang badly, and the relationship between monarch and minister was not harmonious. They had followed the general for many years, and were also aggrieved by this.
They didn’t know if this was really an assassin, or if General Xiang finally couldn’t bear it any more and privately ordered Lü Bu to do it?
Regarding whether they should cooperate with the king’s guards and take down the assassin, or if they should help Lü Bu… Xiang Yu was the only one who could make the final decision.
And as for Xiang Yu, who had an expressionless face but was actually confused, he couldn’t figure it out either.
While they were still in a daze, Lü Bu had happily fought alone against dozens, and his morale grew stronger as he did so.
A sword that was merely a gorgeous decoration for a courtier became a sharp weapon that felled countless others in his hands.
This decision of his to return directly to the palace and kill the King of Chu had only been a whim, but it was still the most suitable choice.
Although he was pants at strategizing, he had the wit to respond quickly to changes.
As long as the King of Chu was alive for one more day, Xiang Yu would be under the control of someone who favoured that ruffian Liu Bang. Who knew how much Liu Bang would make him suffer, and if that happened, until when would he have to wait for the two armies to openly confront each other?
Just now, he made the decision to ‘kill the King of Chu and blame Liu Bang’ after staring at the four Han officers dressed as ordinary soldiers.
Whether it was the west gate that Liu Bang segregated away, the Han officers pretending to be foot soldiers, or Liu Bang disappearing without a trace or farewell… it was all true anyway, what was a few more buckets of dirty water.
Although he couldn’t remember how long Xiang Yu tolerated the King of Chu in history, he knew that Chu and Han fought for supremacy and Xiang Yu appointed himself as the Hegemon-King of Western Chu, so the King of Chu must have been taken care of.
The world considered it a great injustice for a minister to kill his lord. If he wanted to do great things, he had to grasp the banner of righteousness.
Lü Bu had seen with his own eyes how Dong Zhuo, who killed that unlucky emperor Liu Bian, lost the people’s hearts and was chased by a group of warlords under the banner of eliminating tyranny… Lü Bu would never fall into the same pit a second time.
Instead of letting Liu Bang run wild, he might as well act first and stick the pot of regicide on the person who fled the scene. It would be hard for him to argue even if he wanted to.
Lü Bu’s sword rose and fell without pause and, while the Chu soldiers were still hesitating, he quickly killed two of the King of Chu’s closest courtiers and sixty of his guards.
In the hall which had only recently been filled with singing and dancing, there was now a river of blood and piles of corpses.
The guards who had dared to surround Lü Bu, and the soldiers left behind by Liu Bang, were frightened by his ferocious, god-like might. They pushed and shoved at one another, only daring to lift their weapons but not to step forward.
Lü Bu didn’t care that he was covered in blood. He just strode forward and put his sword below the chin of the man who seemed to be ranked the highest and trembled the most among the King of Chu’s remaining staff, then asked in a deep voice, “Do you want to live or die?”
Seeing his approach, the man couldn’t move an inch as he shuddered and wept bitterly, thinking that he was about to die. However, he didn’t expect Lü Bu to take the time to ask questions instead.
He was taken aback for a moment, then he replied fearfully, “I, I-I will listen to General’s orders.”
“I’m not your fucking general, shut up with the useless flattery,” Lü Bu snorted. He used the chilly blade to pat the man’s cheek, and immediately smelled urine in the air.
He frowned, retracted the sword in disgust, took a step back, and said lazily, “If you want to live, then don’t say things that would get you killed, understand?”
The man stared at him stupidly with his mouth open, not emitting a single sound. Lü Bu cursed him for being an idiot under his breath, then impatiently prompted him. “Liu Bang plotted to rebel in order to monopolise the treasures in the Qin Palace, he has coveted the Chu throne for a long time… His Majesty was aware of this and secretly ordered the Grand General to kill him at this banquet, but the thief was cunning, and sent four generals to enter the palace in disguise to assassinate the king… Fortunately, the Grand General is unparalleled in bravery. Although Liu Bang succeeded in his plan, the assassin was killed on the spot…”
As early as when he was in Luoyang with Dong Zhuo, he understood how eloquent these opportunists could be.
Instead of killing them all, it would be better to keep a few alive. For one, it would save him a lot of effort, and for another, it would be easier to deceive the idiots outside.
They were after all close ministers to the king, their words would be more likely to be believed than some random person’s.
Lü Bu wasn’t at all worried that they would object; these people had only gathered around the King of Chu for their own interests, and had targeted Xiang Yu out of fear. Once those interests disappeared and their lives were in danger, each would only be faster than the last to find another backer.
“Understood?” he asked impassively.
The man desperately nodded.
Satisfied, Lü Bu then looked around and considered the people Liu Bang had abandoned at the banquet… but right now he was no longer a marquis, he was a sentry who couldn’t even get his hands on proper clothing.
He looked towards Xiang Yu and Fan Zeng who had stood up at some point, as well as Xiang Bo who was so incensed that he was about to charge up… He directed a malicious grin at the latter and asked provocatively, “In my opinion, none of the thieves here can be kept. What does the general think?”
Damn, was this stupid overlord doing it or not? If he couldn’t even do this, then Lü Bu won’t do any work either!
Translator:
I’m really getting a kick out of trawling the comment section, there are some real gems here
#1: I really want to hear Zhang Liang’s inner thoughts hahahahaha it must be really exciting
#2: It’s probably (???.???)???? and ⊙A⊙! then ⊙?⊙! then 0._.0
#3: Hey #2 why does your kaomoji have nostrils
#4: Zhang Liang: damn, I’m a Hann5A different hán (韩) from Liu Bang’s hàn (汉), and romanized differently in academia to make it clear; it’s actually the same hán used for Korea (韩国). Wikipedia person I don’t wanna serve Liu Bang anymore bye bye
#1: It’s great lol, everyone else is scheming, only Yuyu is seriously drinking wine and daydreaming lol
#2: Maybe he’s thinking… did he actually order Bubu to give the King of Chu a knife hahaha
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- 1指桑骂槐: lit. to point at the mulberry tree and curse the locust tree; meaning to scold indirectly, or to make oblique accusations
- 2A timekeeping method before clocks, approximately 30 minutes
- 3十丈: 1 zhang = 10 chi; 1 chi ≈ 0.22m
- 4Nanmu wood is from the Phoebe zhennan tree, which is found only in the Guizhou, Hubei, and Sichuan provinces; in the past, nanmu wood was so rare that only royal families could afford its use. Wikipedia
- 5A different hán (韩) from Liu Bang’s hàn (汉), and romanized differently in academia to make it clear; it’s actually the same hán used for Korea (韩国). Wikipedia
suiruo says:
Thanks for the chapter! <3
7 September 2023 — 12:37
suiruo says:
Thank you for the update!
7 September 2023 — 05:24